posted 14 hours ago
blameaspartame:

"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood …"

youredarrenfreakingpotter:

My dad would tell me that when we were little and people would say to him “wow, four daughters, that’s a lot of weddings to pay for” (because traditionally the bride’s family would pay for the wedding), my dad would respond with “well, we’re hoping at least one of them will be gay so we can split the cost with the other bride’s family”
He said people never knew how to respond

14,013 notes

posted 14 hours ago
accidentalpornblog:

Read this way out of context.
Anonymous: Over the past year, my sexual fetishes have been slowly getting more perverse; But it wasn't until I spanked a statue that I realized I'd hit rock bottom.

swinging-onthe-spiral:

iguanamouth:

image

image

I’VE SEEN THIS POST FOR THE PAST TWO DAYS AND JUST NOW GOT THE JOKE.

MOTHER FU-

81,962 notes

posted 22 hours ago
"I wonder if your chest ever aches at the sound of my name the same way mine does whenever I hear yours."(via the-psycho-cutie)

38,465 notes

posted 3 days ago

smokecigarettesamongstthestones:

My brother says “shit happens” in response to everything

My brother was given a “shit happens” mug because of this

My brother loved his “shit happens” mug like a child

Last week, my brother dropped his “shit happens” mug

You probably know what his reaction was

82,682 notes

posted 4 days ago
brutalgeneration:

Travels in New Zealand (by SundrySullen)
posted 4 days ago

You met me at a very strange time in my life.
posted 4 days ago
jimdoesntcarrey:

strippedtease:

thank u dad
Women

ikeepcominghome:

We are compared to rose petals
known as soft and delicate creatures.
The air of femininity is meant
to be sweet,
rich of flowers with a dose of mystery

And yet, if there is a hair out of place
more curves than likened
or a higher quantity of seductive nature
that image of rose petals…

4 notes